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Monday, November 3, 2008

STARING DOWN THE BULLET

I came across this old photo the other day. My days as a storm trooper in the desert. I remember them well. The thrill of the hunt, the fear of being hunted. The strategy, the foul-ups that get you and your team shot up. What a rush.


(In photo from left: The Four Amigos: Aaron, Daniel, Jon and me)

I love paintball. It's fun, it's painful and it's learning to stare down the bullet.

One of the first things you learn in paintball is "do not look down" when you are being shot at. If you do, you're bound to get hit on the top of the head, which is usually unprotected. And where we used to play it was cold, and the cold made for hard paint balls. When you duck, you keep looking forward or get a good knock on the head.

So you learn to stare down the bullet and take the hit in the face where you are well protected.

As my surgery day nears, I have an urge to duck. The fear of surgery, that paintball bullet coming at me, is frightening. My fear is at least a little justified. I've had nerve damage twice following surgeries, almost bled to death on another ocassion, and had an adverse reaction that nearly caused a heart attack on another. True, those were more serious surgeries, but I did have nerve damage with the last knee surgery I had. And when you tear a nerve, it is akin to exposing a nerve in a tooth, it really hurts — for days nonstop!

But just like in paintball I need to face it head on. Stare down the bullet and take it square in the face and know that I am well protected through prayer.

5 comments:

Bruce Stewart (施樸樂) said...

I hope the surgery goes well. I have a certain amount of discomfort with my knees (maybe my bike is too small), but anyway I think about you when I think about that. I also wonder whether I am getting a bit old for running and biking (not 28 anymore), although when I have gone for runs over the last year in Taiwan I don't seem to have had any serious problems (even on hilly routes). I wonder what the function of the meniscus is, and whether you will miss anything without it. Just like I wonder whether Tiger will really be able to play golf (at his level) again and keep winning.

Marilyn and Robert said...

Randy dont worry things will be fine. Just think positive and those powers will stay with you. Im a firm believer in positive thinking even though sometimes its hard to do. Anyway love you bro

Debbie said...

Randy I will be thinking about you tommorrow. Everything will be good. Hope you have a speedy recovery. Wish we could all be there with you. Just know you are in our thoughts and prayers. Tommorrow is a new Day, hopefully a much better day for your knee. love ya

Marilyn and Robert said...

hey randy so hurry up and heal cause next year you are doing ironman here right??? its in my town so save up ok????

Debbie said...

GOOD LUCK TODAY RANDY!!!

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